The Snobbery’s Naughty and Nice List 2012 Edition (Part II)

I wasn’t even going to talk about music I don’t like because I DON’T LISTEN TO MUSIC I DON’T LIKE! But you guys (specifically Heather D and Jen Hartling) bullied me into it, and now I’m going to have to do this and be stuck with this crap in my head FOREVER.  I kind of hate you right now, I hope you’re happy.

Mrs Claus with the Naughty List

~o~

Songs/Bands sj HATED in 2012

1.  Train – 50 Ways to Say Goodbye

ZOMG, WTF IS THIS?!  I like mariachi guitars and horns, okay?  No, seriously, I do.  It comes of spending a lot of my youth in Southern California and having neighbours that blasted this ish on weekends.  I especially enjoy when they’re employed non-ironically by punk and ska bands.  I DO NOT, HOWEVER, like when Train uses them.  This is probably one of the worst things I’ve heard in recent years.  It makes me want to stick chopsticks into my eardrums so I don’t have to be subjected to it ever ever ever again.

Not even The Hoff can save this shitty song.

~o~

2.  Gifted but Twisted – Six Pack

I don’t even remember where I first heard this, I think it might have been posted by one of my nieces on facebook over the summer.  I wanted it to be a joke.  Hell, I STILL want it to be a joke.  Please, let this be a joke.  Notice that dude does not, in fact, have a six pack.  Also notice that all of the “beers” featured in the video are full.  No one is actually drinking or having a good time or  “get[ting] FUCKED UP” in this video.  I think because this guy is 14 and all of the strippers he hired for this video are having a hard time not laughing at him.  And they’re bored.  I didn’t even think this was funny enough to sit through the whole thing for mocking purposes.  It’s that bad.

3.  Muse – Madness

Look, any year Muse puts an album out, I’m going to listen to it and then hate on it.  I always subject myself to them because I think “Dude, sj – everyone you know loves this fucking band, what is your problem?”  Even Husband and 6y/o love Muse!  But no.  I just can’t.  I hate Matthew Bellamy’s voice, I hate their rhythm section, I hate…I just hate this band.  HATE.  THIS.  BAND.  …and I just realized I’m not going to make myself try to like them anymore.  I’m donezo.  So long, Muse – you won’t miss me with your millions of adoring fans.  But I still hate you.

4.  Gotye feat. Kimbra – Somebody That I Used to Know

I know this song came out last year.  And I even didn’t think it sucked the first EIGHT HUNDRED THOUSAND TIMES I heard it.  No, really.  Even if I didn’t think it was the best thing ever, I still didn’t hate it and think it should die in a fire.  HOWEVER!  It has now been covered to death, and 2012 was the year that the world ran a semi-decent song into the fucking ground.  Go to YouTube.  Type “Somebody That I Used to Know cover” into the search box.  EIGHTY SIX THOUSAND RESULTS!  Isn’t that a bit overboard, People of Zee Wurl?  DON’T YOU THINK THAT’S A BIT MUCH?!

Anyway, because of this song, I don’t care if he puts out the next best thing ever.  I’m over it.  Sorry, Gotye.  But not really.

Oh, and that brings me to the final item on today’s list.

5.  Anything sung by the cast of Glee.  Anything.

So, I thought this show sounded like a terrible idea when it started, and as a result I’ve never watched a single episode.  The commercials I’ve seen have convinced me that I made the right decision.  You know what else has helped me to know that I’m on the path of RIGHTNESS?  The fact that I CAN NOT ESCAPE THEIR HORRIBLE COVERS.  At all.

So, obvs, they covered Gotye.  That was terrible.  Then I was also subjected to their terrible renditions of RHPS songs.  Don’t forget Gagnam Style!  Because it wouldn’t be a viral sensation if these kids didn’t do a little song and dance to it, right?  Oh, and then there was the worst thing ever, when they covered CELEBRITY SKIN!  I’m pretty sure Amy was the one who told me about this one, and it is probably the WORST THING I HAVE HEARD ALL YEAR.

~o~

There you have it.  You asked for it, and you got it.  My most hated songs of the year.

What made you ragey this year, or wish you didn’t have ears?

44 thoughts on “The Snobbery’s Naughty and Nice List 2012 Edition (Part II)

  1. It was probably last year when Glee did something with 2Cellos. That made me all ragey because it was Smooth Criminal (again) and I felt like Glee was turning them into one trick ponies. I hates Glee.

  2. :O Muse!! :O :O
    Haha I love them, but I have a broken brain so I have an excuse.
    Funnily enough I love “Drops of Jupiter” by Train, but that’s the only song I like. If you listen to the whole of his albums he seems like one of those needy dudes that make for a giant turn off. I blatantly like Drops of Jupiter for the space references. I guess Muse is like that for me too. Super Massive Blackhole, their new album talks about thermodynamics etc. I guess Im more of a lyric person than a sound person. I.e Their “madness” song speaks volumes to me because Im forever trying to figure out if my feelings are real or just part of my “madness”. He says that.

    I HATE GLEE SO MUCH. INTELLIGENT PEOPLE ON TWITTER SAY, “I’M WATCHING GLEE” AND I UNFOLLOW THEM. Sorry for caps, entirely necessary. They sang on XFactor by the way and it was absolutely terrible, so quite fitting for XFactor, because Xfactor sucks.

    • I know, I know. Everyone says “But you LOVE RADIOHEAD, HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE MUSE?!” Um, because one is obviously superior, that’s how.

      But really, I don’t know what it is. It’s one of those things that make me feel broken because I know that TECHNICALLY I should like them. They’re similar to other bands I don’t hate and even sometimes enjoy, so…I don’t know. I just…I just can’t.

      I can’t stand Glee. Like, at all. I don’t understand how it’s popular. I really don’t. It makes me kind of sad to think about it.

      • No i get the Muse thing, they are turning into some dubsteppy type music band, its good when my brains all like WEEEE and manic. I like Radiohead but other people usually say, “No wonder you’re depressed if you like them”. I flipping love Creep and High and Dry, and don’t get why people don’t like them but can happily watch Glee. Seriously my ears felt violated the first (and last) time I watched that.

        I feel the same about Glee as I do about Twilight. Those people need some serious help. Poor things.

        • I get that a lot. “But this is depressing, how have you not lost your mind listening to this yet?” It’s not ALL depressing, and some (most) of their b-sides and covers are amazing.

    • ZOMG, I didn’t even think of that! But, yes it totally works for that. Wait until next week when I talk about the books that made me want to punch puppies!

  3. Here’s where I have the advantage. I still love Gotye (the whole album is actually fantastic) because I don’t listen to the radio at all. I discovered the song quite by accident and have never heard a cover of it, so I can still love.

    I am SO HAPPY you got all ragey just for me. Your rants are the bestest.

  4. Did you hear Los Straitjackets on All Things Considered on Wednesday? They were doing the interstitial bumper music for the whole show live and then they interviewed the band!

  5. OK, I was GOING to listen to all of these songs so I could make an informed comment here, but I got stuck after that Train song and can’t listen to any more because ouch my brain-area.

    That Train singer is pretty, though. And I like one of their songs. I think it’s about marrying someone you meet in a diner, I don’t know.

    ANYWAY, you’re going to laugh so hard at my top songs of the year list, because if the Gotye song isn’t #1, it’s going to be in the top 3, for sure. I ADORE IT. I love that you still love me even though I’m a heathen. (And…I liked the Glee cover of it. I’M SORRY!)

    But, yeah, most Glee songs this season have been TERRIBLE. Just terrible. As has the season, honestly.

    • ZOMG, husband came home the other night with this song BLARING and I greeted him with “Why are you listening to Gotye, you know that song is DEAD TO ME!” and he said “Look, it was Pandora, I’d already skipped too many songs and that wasn’t Gotye, that was GLEE!” So, yeah.

      Anyway, I’m over it. I’ve heard it TOO MANY TIMES and I just can’t even be bothered to listen to it ever again.

      But I still <3 you.

    • Amy! Did you know there’s a Sherlock fan video that introduced me to Gotye’s “Save Me”?

      (Apologies to sj for hijacking her comments section with Gotye squee, but…but…it’s Gotye+Sherlock! Ahem. Again, I apologize ^_^;;; — see, I even added three sweat drops to show how ashamed I am!)

      • I liked the song ok – didn’t love it – but oh, the video was great. I wish they’d been able to add the Sherlock-jumping scene. The facial expressions in that scene would have KILLED me. (I still get teary when I think of that. STILL.)

        • Oh, me too, me too! ^A^;; Though, I think I’d still have wanted the video to end on that bright note, with them laughing. *sniff*

          I agree about the song, too — if I’d first heard it just on its own, it might not have hooked me as much, but damn if those scenes didn’t work so well with the mood and lyrics… now every time I hear the song, it makes me sniffle inside, thinking of all those lovely pre-Reichenbach times.

  6. Whenever you need a brother-in-arms for Muse bashing, call my name (if you provide shipping & handling, I’ll send a conch you can blow into to summon me under extreme circumstances). Their first album, ‘Showbiz’ was -alright-, passable, a few good tracks among a group of forgettable-thus-not-that-insulting ones. Everything since, tripe.

  7. Ha ha ha ha, you make me giggle! I have to admit to digging Muse and Gotye. I don’t listen to the radio. If something gets overplayed it’s my own damn fault because *I’m* the one overplaying it.

    I’ve never watched an episode of Glee. I think I might have gotten sucked in if I’d watched the first few episodes or something? As of now even the commercials make my teeth hurt.

    Thanks for doing this naughty list, my heart is all aglow.

  8. I have only heard of Gotye (that song I listened to only once to find out what the hype was about… meh) and Glee, which I have actively avoided like the plague. I’m a musician and I’m shocked by how many of my fellow (adult) professional musician friends just LOOOOOVE Glee. Really?? No thank you. derp :-/

    • I really don’t get it, either. I think if it had been on when I was in high school, it would have been one of those shows friends forced me to watch, but as an adult, I’m glad to say I have zero interest.

      • Yes. I watched one episode once with a musician friend of mine and I didn’t get it at all. 1: 1: There are better shows about high school. 2: There are better cover versions… or why wouldn’t you just want to listen to the original? Ugh. Also, I just get really squeamishly uncomfortable in general with shows where characters burst into song randomly, for seemingly no reason at all. That only works for me if I willingly sit down with the intent to watch an ACTUAL (historically good) musical.

        • Now that you mention it, I think the bursting into song might be the main reason I can’t stomach the thought of this show. I am not really a fan of musicals (Once More With Feeling being pretty much the only exception I can come up with off the top of my head), so that’s probably it.

  9. Sigh. Somehow, I had a feeling “Somebody that I Used to Know” would be on here. Not sure how, I just knew. It’s ok, we can still be friends ;) I do really like his “Save Me,” too…though, that could be because I first heard it via a Sherlock fan video. Heh.

    But I totally, TOTALLY agree about the annoyingness of Glee covers. And some of Straight No Chaser’s covers…they were hilarious with their “12 Days of Christmas,” but then they started cover/medley-ing EVERYTHING. Thing is, if I really like someone’s song, I’d really rather hear it from them, not someone else. With a few exceptions, of course. Like the Blackmore’s Night version of “Diamonds and Rust,” which I like better than the original.

    But the thing that makes me literally slap my hands over my ears every time is the stupid commercial that plays OVER AND OVER AGAIN on the Pandora Christmas stations. The one where the lady is gushing about how her shopping experience is like “Jingle Bells” because, y’know, “Oh, what fun! … Making spirits bright! … Dashing through the aisles! …” I can’t handle this level of cheezy.

  10. Muse were better in their apocalyptic space rock period – i.e. the middle two albums. That’s when they peaked, I think. They’ve never topped Absolution. I think they’ve done a Radiohead in that once Thom Yorke and the boys got a license to print money (i.e. OK Computer) they figured they could do whatever they wanted, which is where Kid A and the rest of the catalogue came from. Muse sold shedloads of the Black Holes album and now they’ve turned into Queen. Or U2, depending on the day. You get a band who don’t seem to care too much about who they are and will therefore rip off whomever they want. It’s a shame, because when they’re being Muse, they still rock out with the best of them.

    I hated ‘Madness’ when I first heard it; it’s ‘I Want To Break Free’ all over again. But it is a grower. I still prefer ‘City of Delusion’, anyway.

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