“The great grey beast February had eaten Harvey Swick Alive”

I feel kind of guilty using that quote (one of my favourite opening lines ever, btw) today, when this post isn’t even ABOUT The Thief of Always, but it totally fits, so…sorry Clive Barker.  I do plan on re-reading it this year, just not this month.  Because I have OTHER PLANS for this month.

That’s right, I’ve decided to catch up on the numerous zombie books I’ve been holding onto for no real good reason, so February is now ZOMBRUARY.

At last count, I had 20 unread zombie novels (I’m not counting the comics yet, cos there are more of those than I care to admit), and if I can keep up the pace I had in January, I should be able to get through all of them, along with my re-reads of The Shining, Night Shift and The Stand with Heather and my re-reads of Fforde with the Heathers (that makes ME Veronica! HAHA!).

So, anyway, I plan on MOSTLY reading zombie lit this month.  I guess I’ll find out if it’s possible for me to get tired of zombies, since I always said it would never happen.

I realize I’m way behind on reviewing things I’ve actually read (and/or even just updating my YoRWtFIW page), but I’ll get around to it at some point.

Or not.  At this point I really don’t know.  I guess we’ll find out together, won’t we?

What are your reading plans for this month?

Fforde Ffangirling In Effect

I’ve made absolutely no attempt to hide my extreme ffangirliness when it comes to the work of Jasper Fforde.  I’d read the dude’s grocery list if he decided to stop writing ffiction (I wonder how long I can keep this up?), and I’ve been pushing everyone I know to read him since I ffirst discovered his work.  I haven’t done an inbox purge in quite a while, and the oldest email I could ffind was from a ffriend of mine in March of ’11 that read:

So I popped in to Forbidden Planet today. What has two thumbs and a signed copy of The Eyre Affair? THIS GUY!

Because I pressured him into it of course.  At that point, I’d been pressuring him about it FFOREVER and he finally caved.  Because that’s the way I roll.  I don’t know how to just mildly suggest something.  I will bug the shit out of you until you give in because you just want me to shut the ffuck up about it, already.

You know who’s (mostly) immune to my pressuring?  Heather D. I’m pretty sure I’ve been bugging the crap out of her about reading Fforde for as long as we’ve known each other, and she only just gave in in December.

While it makes me happy that she ffinally gave in (and LOVED HIM), it makes me a little sad that my powers don’t work on everyone.  She must be a Toydarian.

Sorry, guys, I had some wine in the tub, so the RAMBLING is also in effect.

[looks ffor the point she knows she had somewhere]

Oh!  Right.

So, I re-read The Eyre Affair and Lost in a Good Book (the ffirst two books in the Thursday Next series) during the move/Time of No Internet (yes, it deserves to be a Proper Noun), and Heather L AND Heather D both read the ffirst book at approximately the same time.  This was a ffirst read ffor both of them.

I ffeel the need to digress a moment and tell you all that I ffirmly realize that Fforde may not be everyone’s cuppa.  I mean, just because I love something, doesn’t mean that everyone else will (even if I know I’m right).  Keeping that in mind, I read, while beset by worries that one or both Heathers would decide I was ffull of it and think I had no idea what I was talking about.

Luckily, this did not turn out to be the case.  They both loved it.  THEY BOTH LOVED IT.

Now, the two Heathers don’t necessarily always have a lot in common as ffar as books go, so this means that I chose something as one of my All Time Ffavourites that might just appeal to more than a small group of people, yes?

So I thought.

And, like most masochists do, I went looking ffor the people that would dare to disagree with me.

Most of the one star reviews ffor The Eyre Affair made some sense.  If literary puns and alternate universes (with time travel!  and blackjack! and hookers!) aren’t really your thing, you probably won’t enjoy these books at all.  But if you still have the sense of humour of a child, and make the occasional That’s What She Said joke, and are ffairly well read, then you just might enjoy these for what they are.

BUT THEN!

I ffound a review saying that the book was “horribly written” and “a bit hot mess [sic]” and saying that the author “did not do his research.”

This left me scratching my head.

The reason for said head scratching was that…I mean, if you actually read the book (and if you’ve actually read any of the books referenced), you’ll see that Fforde is just as big a literary ffanboi as any of us.  His research has been done, and it was done so that he could purposely tweak OUR past to ffit the past of the world he created.

Does that make sense?

Maybe it doesn’t now, because (as I said) I had some wine in the tub.  What I’m saying is that Fforde knows his shit (Schitt, hee), and BECAUSE he does, he’s so successful at turning it all on its head.

So seeing someone say that there needed to be more research made me (quite ffrankly) a little ragey.

BUT I KEPT MYSELF UNDER CONTROL.

No, really.

I totally did.

I saw in her comments that people had tried to explain that this was an AU, and she brushed them off, so I thought “Well, hell.  Maybe she just doesn’t know what an AU is?” and tried to expand on that ffor her.

But she tried to take it back and say that it was just about the writing.  The horrible writing.

I DON’T KNOW WHY I TRY TO REASON WITH PEOPLE ANYMORE.

I think I’m just going to start being a megatroll and leave it at that.

[deep breath]

The Snobbery’s Naughty and Nice List 2012 Edition (Part V)

So I saw a comment in my twitter feed last Wednesday (the day the previous installment was posted), where someone was wishing that people would stop posting Best Of lists.  The bitchy contrary part of me immediately said (yes, out loud) “MAKE TEN MORE LISTS!!!!”  Now (and partially because Em is totally a bad influence) I’m trying to come up with increasingly ridiculous lists.  You might see some.  OR YOU MIGHT NOT.  You might also get a round of posts full of foul language after my dad makes me go see The Hobbit next weekend.  I DON’T KNOW YET.  You’ll have to wait and see.

ANYWAY, this post is going to cover things I read this year that I loved that didn’t make it onto the last list.

~o~

~o~

sj’s TIP TOP FAVOURITE Books Read in 2012

ALL THE WALTER MOERS!

Susie DMed me in August, telling me she’d suggested my name to Tara as someone who might be interested in a blog tour she (Tara) was setting up for the upcoming Labyrinth of Dreaming Books.  ”Have you/would you be interested in reading Walter Moers?” she asked.

At that point, I’d never even heard of him, but City of Dreaming Books sounded like something that was right up my alley, so I said I would be THE MOST INTERESTED, SEND ME ALL THE BOOKS! (um, paraphrasing)

I fell in love with CoDB within the first few pages.  Like, hard.  And then I got angry.  Because I couldn’t believe that NO ONE HAD BOTHERED TO TELL ME ABOUT THESE BOOKS BEFORE NOW!  There are very few authors who can write something that feels like it was written expressly for me.  The further I got into that book (and then subsequent books), the more I realized I was reading the exact sort of thing I’d ask someone to write for me – y’know, if that sort of thing were okay.

Walter Moers has been added to my list of “ZOMG, CAN’T WAIT MUST READ NAO!” authors.  There aren’t many on that list, so I hope he realizes what an honour it is to be there.  Hee.  Also, there are two other books already translated into English that I haven’t read yet, but I’ll be buying those for myself right after the holidays, when it’s okay to spend money on myself again.

Unless someone wants to buy me presents, then you can get me The 13½ Lives of Captain Bluebear and Rumo & His Miraculous Adventures.  Just sayin’.

~o~

My New Favourite Thursday Next Novel by Jasper Fforde

I’ll admit that I’m a little bit of an asshole about this.  Not EVERY BOOK can be my favourite, but every time I finish one of these I say “Nope.  That one’s my favourite.  Forget the rest, this one is the best.”  I REALLY MEAN IT THIS TIME!  Which kind of surprised me, because on paper, this book should have been one of my least favourites in the series.

It didn’t have ANY of the stuff I loved about the last few books, and it was set entirely in Swindon, which should have been the kiss of death…but somehow it wasn’t terrible.  No, in fact, it totally rocked.

I cried, I laughed, I wanted to punch things.  Isn’t that what we all hope we’ll get from our books?  That kind of emotional response, something that just makes you glad you know how to read?

By the time I got to the last page, I had a huge smile on my face and knew there was no way I’d be able to review it impartially.  Do me a favour, if you hate these books, please don’t tell me.  I get wildly irrational, and wouldn’t be able to pretend to be nice to you anymore.

He spent his life immersed in books to the cost of everything else, even personal relationships. “Friends,” he’d once said, “are probably great, but I have forty thousand friends of my own already, and each of them needs my attention.”

~o~

Obviously this summer wasn’t my first, tenth, or even twentieth time reading through Tolkien.  It was, however, the first time I’d attempted to read it with a group.  It was also the first time I’d actually tried to commit my thoughts on these books to writing.  Everyone that participated gives me warm fuzzies.  Thank you, so much for joining, for reading, for drinking along with the movies, for writing your own posts, and just for showing up to keep me from talking to myself.

Truly.  Thank you.  <3

(If you didn’t participate in the group read/watch, but are still interested in reading the posts and comments, click on the Puttin’ the Blog in Balrog menu right below the header.)

~o~

So, this is a bit of promotion for some friends I love dearly and am incredibly proud of.  Volcanoes is Nicole‘s third book in her Grace Murphy series, and it’s her best yet.  I can’t review it because I’m FAR TOO CLOSE to it, but I can tell you that I love Grace (even when she’s an idiot) and I’m incredibly happy just knowing these books exist.

…AND THEN!  The lovely Amy had a book of poetry published this year!  AND IT’S SO GOOD!  I don’t usually read poetry but Amy made me want to read more.  No, seriously.

Go buy both of these books.  Or not.  But I think you should.

~o~

That’s all for today!  These are the books I loved the very very most in 2012, I hope you all had just as many new reading loves this year, too.  Thanks for reading.

The Snobbery’s Naughty and Nice List 2012 Edition (Part IV)

Now that my Rant Engines have been re-engaged, I’m having a hard time getting it together enough to talk about the things I loved this year.  AND THERE WERE SO MANY!  I might have to split this Nice post into two.  One for NEW things and one for things that were NEW TO ME.  Or I might just mix them up and put everything in neat little categories.

Sound good?

Honestly, I really don’t care if it sounds good because that’s how I’m doing it.  So there.

~o~

~o~

sj’s Favourite Books of 2012

Best SF

The Deacon’s Tale by Arinn Dembo (reviewed Mar. 18)

Really, I shouldn’t have liked this as much as I did.  As you can see right there on the cover, this is a Sword of the Stars novel.  I don’t play, nor have I ever played Sword of the Stars (but it appears to have a decent following, I just don’t play many computer games anymore).  It’s set in an established future universe that should really only appeal to SotS gamers.

But I loved it.  No tedious infodumps for newbs, just good story telling.  And the best part?  There were these detailed Appendices at the end, that were really supposed to be for the players, but that I found incredibly helpful.

If you like space operas, give this a try.  As I said up there, you don’t have to’ve played the game to fall into this one.

Best YA

I have a few choices for this one, so just hang tight.

The Last Dragonslayer by Jasper Fforde (review haiku May 14), Debris Dreams by David Colby (reviewed Oct. 15) and Katya’s World (reviewed Oct. 1) by Jonathan L Howard

So, here we have 2 sf novels and a fantasy novel.  Other than the genre aspect, the only thing in common is how very SMART they are.  These are books that don’t assume young readers are stupid.  These are books that don’t act all condescending to their readers, just because they MIGHT not be adults.  I’ve already talked my 13 year old into reading the Fforde, but I’m still WORKING on getting him into sf, so the other two might be a bit of a struggle.

These are books that make me wish I knew more kids in their target age group so that I could hand them a bundle of awesome reading material this holiday.

If you have teens that like reading and you want to get them something that isn’t full of icky love triangles and stupid girls that need to be rescued every five seconds, buy them these books.

Best MG

How to Train Your Dragon series by Cressida Cowell

OKAY, YOU CAUGHT ME!

1. I haven’t reviewed these here, only on goodreads.
2. I haven’t actually finished the series, I have only read the first six books (but I do have the next 2, I’m just missing 9 and 10).

So, forgive me for that, but ZOMG WHY HAVEN’T YOU READ THESE YET?!  I know you’ve probably all seen the Dreamworks movie that claims to be based on the first book, but they ARE NOTHING ALIKE.  And, as my husband informed me last night, I’m not allowed to talk shit about the movie retroactively since I saw it before I read these, but…

I’m kind of going to anyway.

Sorry, husband.

It’s really unfair to compare the two.  They’re both set in the same place, and the characters (some of them) have the same names, but other than that they really don’t have a whole lot in common.  The books are a lot funnier than the movie was, and you won’t LOVE TOOTHLESS in the books like you did in the movie…unless you love him for being a little asshole all the time.  Because he totally is, but it’s hilarious.  Instead of getting Hiccup OUT of trouble, he’s usually the CAUSE of the trouble, and he shows zero remorse for it.

Adults, you’ll like these if you still retain your childish whimsy.  Parents, get them if you have little boys and girls that like Vikings and dragons and can appreciate a well-told fart joke.

Best Urban Fantasy

The Collector series (reviewed June 19 and Aug. 26) by Chris F. Holm and the Miriam Black series (reviewed Jul. 16 and Jul. 23) by Chuck Wendig

Oh, look!  We could easily call this “sj’s ZOMG FAVOURITE Covers of the Year” or “Angry Robot Really Outdid Themselves With These Titles” or “Just Take My Money For The Next Twelve Books Already.”

I don’t know if there will be that many more with either of these series, but a girl can hope, yeah?

Anyway, the only thing these books have in common with each other (other than the things mentioned above) are their publisher and that they’re awesome.

The Collector series follows Sam, a basically good guy who made a few bad decisions and now works collecting the souls of the damned.  Both books are great, but I like the second a bit more.  It expands on the first (it’s not really necessary to read both, but you’ll catch cool little references if you read them back to back), but doesn’t get mired in further backstory than is necessary.  They’re both incredibly fastpaced and difficult to put down.  I really can’t wait to read The Big Reap in July.  CAN’T WAIT.

Miriam Black is not for the faint of heart.  If you’re adverse to swearing, or…well, just some gross out imagery, you should skip these.  Seriously.  There are a ton of really bad reviews by people who went in thinking they were getting another YA UF novel with a pretty cover and hated it because this wasn’t what they were expecting.  Kate told me after she read Blackbirds that she wanted to take a bunch of showers, and that’s pretty accurate.  You’ll feel a little dirty after finishing.  Carpet Noodle.

~o~

Next time, I’ll talk about my NEW FAVOURITE AUTHOR and a new book by one of my CURRENT FAVOURITES.  In the meantime, talk amongst yourselves.  What did you lovelovelove this year?

30 Day Book Challenge: Day 30

[gasp]  I did it!  Well, once this post is finished, I will have done it!  Wioll haven be…and that reference right there brings us full circle back to DAY ONE.  I swear, sometimes I totally rule.

Okay, um…what was I supposed to talk about today?

[runs to check]

Sorry, I’m a bit scatterbrained today.  I’ve been building things out of duct tape, cardboard and fun foam all weekend for my kids for Hallowe’en and so I didn’t get this post written last night like I wanted because I just watched Mockingbird Lane and went STRAIGHT TO BED at MIDNIGHT!  I can’t even believe I was in bed at midnight, it would have been nice if I’d been able to sleep as WELL as being in bed, but I guess I can’t have everything.

An Author That I’ll Read Whatever They Put Out

(aka That’s What She said)

(aka…and the award for the most awkwardly worded topic goes to…)

How adorable is this picture? Plus, My Little Pony – my kids would flip out.

If you haven’t read Jasper Fforde yet, I have to wonder why we’re even still speaking.  Or, why I haven’t already cast you out for not listening to me about one of the most brilliant and whimsical living authors.

Look.  I’m hardpressed to pick a favourite author.  I can tell you about many authors that I love, that I will EVENTUALLY GET AROUND TO reading whatever they put out, but Jasper Fforde is the only one that I will drop every single other thing I’m doing to read the hour it comes out.

Which can be difficult, lemme tell you.  Because he’s a Welsh author and his primary deal is with a UK publisher (America gets to totally feel second-class in the reading world), his books generally come out over there anywhere from a few months to SEVERAL YEARS earlier than they do here.

So, I spend a lot of my book stipend buying books from the UK just so I can read them because I am TOO IMPATIENT to wait.

Take, as an example, his The Last Dragonslayer books.  I searched and searched and searched for these books (the first two, anyway – the third isn’t out yet).  The first one has been out since November ’10 in the UK, but was only published over here this month.  Man.  AND THEN nearly everyone I know that reads him (well, really,  Amy, Katrina and Meg were the only people I knew for a very long time) was all “WHAT IS THIS BOOK, I HAVE NEVER HEARD OF IT?!”  Yes, capattack totally necessary.  So.  It’s kind of ridiculous, and I know they do it to coincide with his trips to the States to do booksignings and stuff, but that doesn’t make the READERS feel any better when they have to jump through all these hoops just to read a damn book.

I realize that’s not making me sound very stable, but it’s a valid complaint so I’ll leave it.

Anyway.

I have already read every single thing he’s put out (hee) and will continue to do so, for as long as he writes his special brand of smart, literary (NOT literary as in, this is literary fiction, literary in that it’s all very meta and plays with books and literature in various ways) humour.

Also – Pickwick MAY have been part of the inspiration for Dodisharkicorn (um, hint:  she totally was).

PLOCK!

In conclusion – if you’re not already reading Jasper Fforde, go out and get yourself a copy of The Eyre Affair or The Big Over Easy or Shades of Grey – The Road to High Saffron (please, no 50 Shades jokes) and we can maybe still be friends.

Friends, who is YOUR must-read-right-now author?